Tuesday, December 8, 2009

This video tour is brought to you by MAJOR lack of focus.

Edited to add: I wrote this post yesterday, but I couldn't get the video to upload.  And since a video tour's quite lame wthout the actual video.  I didn't post it.  But today the video uploaded {hence the posting}.  

{Oh, but let me verify that even though the video DID upload it does't in any way mean it's still not LAME}

{Just wanted to make sure you weren't expecting more than my usual lameness.}

{Okay, I'm done with this "edited to add"}

{For real}

I've had a hard time focusing today. A REAL hard time.

I'm not quite sure what my problem is.

Take the laundry for instance…

I have two laundry baskets of fresh, clean laundry wrinkling on the washer and dryer waiting to be folded and put away. They've been sitting there all day. I went to fold it first thing this morning. But as I made my way into the laundry room something fell from the ceiling and landed on my head. I did the only sensible thing to do when something falls from the ceiling and hits you on the head. I let out the most classy and feminine FOUR LETTER WORD {rhymes with mitt} put both hands over my head, clutched tightly and IMMEDIATELY fell to a semi-fetal, semi-squat position.

Do you know what you shouldn't do when something falls from the ceiling and hits you on the head?


You should never swear! :)

And you should NEVER put both hands over your head and clutch tightly.

Because there's a chance that the thing that fell from the ceiling would be a green, sticky ball that Aunt Kate had purchased from the quarter machine to appease a demanding three-year-old. A three-year-old that throws the said green, sticky ball on the ceiling right by the laundry room door and leaves it to fall on any random passerby's head.

And that passerby just might be you. And if you indeed put both hands over your head and clutch tightly you will spend the next twenty-seven minutes trying to unstick the green, sticky thing from your uncombed locks.

However, due to all the lack of focus, standing in front of the mirror for twenty-seven minutes trying to remove a green slimy ball from my hair made me realize one thing. MY EYEBROWS. OH, MY EYEBROWS! Those babies need some major waxing. Like, NOW! And we all know that according to {fake} Ancient Chinese Proverb, "Women should never fold laundry with bush for eyebrows!"

So I once again neglected the laundry for far more important duties, and went upstairs to plug in the wax. While the wax warmed, I played with those children of mine. And because they focus about like me we played no less than eight-seven different games. Each lasting 92 seconds.

Then I looked at the clock. No time to wax eyebrows, no time to do laundry. Only barley time to shower and brush teeth and meet my just turned 28 year old friend, Kali Jo, for a birthday lunch.

::Kali Jo & I::
After lunch I stopped by the store to grab some paper towels and some sprinkles for the gingerbread cookies my little family would be making for Family o'evening {which is what the three-year-old owner of the green, slimy ball calls it}. I walked out of the store with a roll of SpongeBob Christmas wrapping paper, a little gift for Spence's stocking and a reusable shopping bag of other grocery items that DID NOT include paper towels or any form of sprinkles. I'm telling you guys, my focus was off.

Then I came home and instead of folding said laundry I started a little craft project, but the dishes were bothering me so I neglected the craft for the dishes. Then neglected the dishes for an intense Dora the Explorer computer game with Brynlee. Then Brynlee got bored and I swept the floor, but before I cleaned up the pile of dirt I got distracted by my email. The email led to a phone call. Which led to a second trip into town. Which led to the purchase of some sprinkles {but no paper towels}. Then I got home, and finished sweeping the floor. And since the floor was swept and the dishes done I might as well take some pictures of the new kitchen. And since I have exactly zero focus, I instead took a little video because that would surely waste more time and keep me from folding the abandoned laundry:

A few things about the video:

• The colors are way off. In the video my kitchen table, walls and floor have a dingy yellowish look. And the floor and the cabinets don’t really look like they match. But in real life, they do match and everything is not yellow. I guess you’re going to have to come over and visit and see for yourself. I will be sure to put all green, sticky balls in the toy box if you come.
• That black and white flower thing that you see when I show you the floor is my apron. I’m not wearing a skirt with my jeans. Not that there is anything wrong with wearing a skirt over your jeans.
• Do I really sound that annoying when I talk? And that little laugh thing I did. Sorry about that. That’s a little creepy!
• I wonder how Wiley would feel about being called “our” cabinet guy?
• Why yes, that is mistletoe hanging in the door way.
• Do you like the archway below the mistletoe? We put that in as well. I love it ‘cause it matches the arches on the upper cabinets.
• Do you like how I point out the sink, dishwasher, microwave and sliding glass door? I’m quite the tour guide now, aren’t I?
• We still need to paint and hang the last of the trim and buy rugs and barstools. {I gave my old barstools to my little sister in exchange for the BLUE trampoline circus stairs.} And I still need to do the decorating.

And I'm going to get to all those things first thing tomorrow morning. Right after I wax my eyebrows.  And fold that dang laundry.
And here's some still shots for those of you who chose not to listen to my annoying voice. No hard feelings, this would be the option I would choose too:


Woolf Family said...

thanks I love home makeover posts and I love your new kitchen

Lindsey Lou said...

That is a stinkin' amazing kitchen. All the hard work paid off. Your voice isn't annoying. When we need a kitchen update we will be sure to call you and Spence for pointers/help :)

Jami said...

Brooke wants to keep watching the "movie" over and over!!! Love it!!

Lacy said...

I love you! You are so funny! I'm so glad you commentated a video. Now I can't tell you if you really sound like that (which isn't annoying by the way) because I haven't heard you talk in forever. But I have your voice catalogged in my head and that is now how it sounds. Wait, that is how your church talks sounded. I don't remember what word you used but like the 4th word in your video sounded just like your mom! And you so something cute with your s's that I don't remember hearing before.

Your kitchen is FABULOUS! Man all that HARD/LONG work payed off. I hope you love it. I also love your polkadot apron. I want a pretty femine I love lucy apron and I love black and white polk a dots (yes, that could be a hint).

Now I belive you fibbed in your post because there is no way you "barely" had time to shower before your Cali Joe lunch and still look that exquisite! and if in deed you did just barely shower and looked that exquisite then I take it back I don't love you. :)

Your kitchen is such a nice size and shape. Am I remembering right, was that 2 pantries? brilliant idea. The only thing I would have to do differently if that was my kitchen is put a lock on those bottom spice pull outs. My son would have them all dumped out in no time. If he was in a more artistic mood he instead would put garlic in the cookies etc. I'm in enough troublewhen I leave one with the lid off with in arms reach while cooking. The other day the brownies were only saved from the onion powder because I uncharacteristically put the lid back on as soon as I finished with it. phew. Well, I just went on and on didn't I.

You said you were interested to know how you've changed. Well you are alot the same, but of course you've grown up. Many of the changes I've noticed are trivial like umm lets see: feminine word that rhymes with bit :), diet coke fiending, tomato eating, sponge bob watching (but that's because you love spencer, I remember that post).
P.S. I didn't really count but if I didn't get the 30 pics in 30 days I apologize. I lost my camera but have been in denial that I lost it becaue I don't want to tell my husband that I indeed lost another camera. I searched once for some old pictures of you and I trying on the old dresses in my closet. It was to no evail. I haven't felt bloggy lately. So, please forgive my lack of 30.

Love Lacy.

Beth said...

Hey, you have a gorgeous kitchen. I'm so jealous. You guys did awesome. Anytime you want to come over...

Mikey, Anna, Lillie and Sam said...

Love the kitchen. I'm very jealous of the spice racks, I have so many spices and I can never find the one I want very easily. Maybe we will have to make it up there while we visit JUST to admire your kitchen. Love ya and we are excited to see you guys.

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